ks

Rolley Lake

09/21/15

I have always wanted to create YouTube videos since the moment I started watching them. Being the standard fifteen year-old girl I was drawn to the “Beauty-Guru” genre. Sitting in my dorm room watching hours upon hours of footage, constantly repeating to myself, “I can do this!” The truth was I wasn’t a makeup artist; no I was just a self-conscious teenager who wasn’t brave enough to upload videos in the fear of my classmates somehow finding out. I continued watching YouTube, filming and editing my own videos but never letting my creations see the light of day. Everything that I filmed just wasn’t me. No matter what I did everything came across fake & try hard. At the end of the day I wasn’t a makeup artist, just a kid pretending to know what she was talking about.

 

As the years past YouTube evolved, new players came into the game and changed my perception on creative content. Creators like Casey Neistat, Ben Brown & Devin Graham opened my eyes to a whole new realm of possibilities. There had always been a level of dissatisfaction I had felt whenever I watched a makeup tutorial. I wanted to offer more, not that I didn’t respect and appreciate every single person who was more confident than myself to be able to talk straight to a camera for 15 plus minutes.

 

I have always been more intrigued by production versus performance. I never wanted to be center stage; I wanted to be the director who had put the whole show together. That passion combined with my interest in street fashion lead me to a Fashion Marketing Diploma. As I was in school I continually thought about ways to film YouTube videos, but always using my schooling as an excuse never to give anything a try. Finally reaching graduation I found employment in a low-end fast fashion chain. I worked doing in store visuals & stock management in conjunction with my serving/bartending job at night. I hated my life. It had a lot to do with the upper management & cliental of the store I was working for. I enjoyed my assigned daily tasks and took pride in everything I did, but working with low quality clothes not to mention broken or missing fixtures ate away at my soul each day.

 

That leads me to where I am now. Still working my serving job sporadically throughout the week, but not furthering my future in anyway. I cannot make any more excuses. I cannot continue watching other people live their lives through the computer screen. I am not sure where this will end up, or exactly what I will end up creating but I refuse to continue to sit idly for any longer.